No Church Today

Today, Vlad and I aren't going to church.  He doesn't want me to exert myself at all since I will be returning to work tomorrow.  However, I'm going CRAZY staying at home.  The bleeding is almost gone....but I do notice that every time I try to do something around the house the bleeding starts again.  So it is probably best I do nothing.  

I can't believe that this time last week at church, I was thanking God for our miracle.  Today, I go back to asking God to give us a miracle.  At this point, I feel almost the same as I did before I got pregnant....just hoping that I will become a mom.  Is it bad that I keep dreaming of having a child?  I keep looking at cribs, bedding, etc. and sometimes I catch myself and say....stop....this is stupid.  But I can't help but think it will happen so I might as well get my research done now.  I don't know....maybe I'm a little nuts.....or maybe I'm on to something.  All I know is that the next few months are going to be LONG!  I also pray that we some how miraculously get pregnant on our own before IVF.  But that is highly unlikely.  

Next weekend, I have to get a CBC done (complete blood count) for my ITP and make sure that the miscarriage didn't cause my platelet count to drop considerably.  I doubt it did because I really don't see any signs except for the two places on my arms.  You know I forgot to mention that when I was in the hospital for my miscarriage....the nurse asked me if I had a blood transfusion in the last 3 months because the blood bank wanted to know.  Of course, I told her no....I haven't had a transfusion in almost a year.  She said that there were antibodies found in my blood that could be from the transfusion.  Interesting that it's still lingering.  Although, Dr. Damle said when I spoke to her on Thursday afternoon that the miscarriage has nothing to do with the ITP or anything because my counts were normal.  354k to be exact!  Yay!  

In one of the comments I received, I was asked if I ever received a progesterone check after the IUIs.  Yes, I did.  Each time my progesterone level was above where it needed to be.  So lack of progesterone doesn't seem to be the issue for my miscarriage either.  But thanks for asking....I guess I forgot to mention that.  

I truly appreciate the love and support I've gotten so far.  Besides the comments that were left here...but also the e-mails I have received.  I know there are people who care for me and can't wait for my baby to come as much as I do.  And I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.  Donna, I will not forget about our ice cream date....believe me!

Oh one more thing, I will not be speaking about my IVF process with anyone because I'm Catholic and the Catholic church does not exactly like the idea of IVF.  However, we feel that we want to do God's will and reproduce and bring children onto this earth.  We believe that God will not punish us for trying to do His will.  However, I don't want to offend anyone and their beliefs so we are keeping this to ourselves. So please, if you know me IRL (in real life) please do not share what we are going through with anyone.  You are one of the special few we wanted to share this with and I would appreciate that my blog entries does not become topic of conversation at dinner, etc.  

Thanks again for your support and keep us in your prayers!